Category Archives: Uncategorized

Recap on 2 years… oh what????

Dearest Libby Ann,

Well hello there daughter. You are number four in a great bunch of little ladies. You were born about 3 months ago and I am finally (once again, I think I always say this on here), finally writing about it. You have captured my heart with your sweet gummy grins and your oh so perfect sleeping and how you hardly ever cry. Needless to say little lady I am in love with you! It’s far too late for me to write about your entry into the world, so we will save that for another day. But you are such a blessing to this mama.

With you being 3 months we embark on the fact that we are coming up quickly to year #2 of living in this house of ours. How have 2 years past by so quickly and nothing was documented? Well here is the short version on bullet points on what has happened in the past 2 years:

  • bought our first home! yay! – total provision from the Lord
  • the day we were supposed to close the government froze and our loan was on hold for another month…
  • have had 6 international students live with us at different points of time in the last 2 years… China, Vietnam, and Japan.
  • had our first ambulance experience with a child in 2014. (do not want to try that one again)
  • got a dog. Coco she was 5 when we got her. She is part german shepherd and something else.
  • took Hannah to OHSU 4 times due to bladder reflux and kidney issue. This stressed me out every time. One day the Lord healed her and we did not have to return,… (many ultra sounds and catheters were involved… gag me but Praise the Lord, there was much rejoicing)
  • Somewhere in there Hannah walked at 13 months.
  • got pregnant with baby #4
  • Did not find out what she was…
  • bought chickens who lived in our basement for a reeeeeeallllly long time.
  • Ava has now lost 3 teeth and is 6 years old… ohhhh whattt????
  • Had baby girl #4 on 7/11/2015! (we have 4 girls)
  • started 10th year with CRU at WOU as staff…
  • Baby #4 also paid a visit to OHSU due to weird overlapping skull pieces but again saw how faithful our God is and it disappeared.

and I am sure there is more, but that is the brief recap…

next up… Liberty comes into the world!

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perspective from 2011

So have you ever been on google earth? Well if you have not, google earth is pretty cool and in my mind kind of freaky too. But anyhow, we will stick to the pretty cool side of things. How it works is you plug in an address and hit enter. All of a sudden you go from looking at the earth to the picture zeroing in on your location. In my crazy mind, while looking at this visual happening I also envision a zooming noise taking place. Woooooosh! One that starts slowly and picks ups speed until I am zeroed in (like I said before) on what ever the address/object is you would like to see.

My life is a lot like that at times. I’m looking at what I think is the big picture, but then all of a sudden when I hit the enter button my perspective changes and I am zoomed into the actual thing I needed to see all along. God gives us people to help us at times to point  us to that perspective. This is why having friends who love Jesus is so very important. They help us see the actual location on the world map when all we can see is the big globe. They are able to see the address we have been searching for.

So with all of that said, tonight I had a conversation with a friend I treasure a ton and am so thankful God has blessed me with. She currently lives as a missionary, somewhere in the world. (A lot of detail eh? It’s just to keep her cute self safe). In our conversation we talked about the things we are struggling with and the ways we see the Lord at work. We got on the topic of comparisons. Oh man do I compare. Ugh. So in so has a house and I, well don’t. So in so gets to buy new clothing all of the time and I well don’t. Those folks get to eat out so much. They have a dishwasher. Their parents live close and can watch the kids. It gets so bad at times that I try and find ways to fix my dissatisfied heart. Well I’ll buy this thing. Or I deserve a Starbucks right now because I feel this way. Or if I play my cards just right, then I may be satisfied.  blah blah blah. Oh my heart is so weak and ugly.

It’s so funny that I do this as I am sure other adults do this as well. I am always telling Ava, my three year old, not to worry about what her sister has or doesn’t have and to be concerned with her own actions. I myself need to be concerned with what the Lord has given me and be satisfied in the gifts that I have been freely given. I need not be concerned with what others have or don’t have and what I have in comparison or don’t have. So getting back to speaking with my friend, she shared with me this lovely little nugget of a verse:

 Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.  Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited. – Romans 12:14-16

 So much easier to just Rejoice with those who rejoice. Rejoice with the fact that the Lord has given them certain things and

 

Ecclesiastes 2:24-26   24 A person can do nothing better than to eat and drink and find satisfaction in their own toil. This too, I see, is from the hand of God, 25 for without him, who can eat or find enjoyment? 26 To the person who pleases him, God gives wisdom, knowledge and happiness, but to the sinner he gives the task of gathering and storing up wealth to hand it over to the one who pleases God. This too is meaningless, a chasing after the wind.


well hello

Well hello there. After my 365 plus day hyatus I am back! I’m not sure where to start. Should I start with the fact that I am ecstatic that I have eggs in the fridge again, the fact that I am 33 weeks pregnant with baby #4, my other 3 kiddos are 6, 4, and almost 2? So Much has happened and I have been horrible at recording any of it. So we shall start small…

Today. It was a pretty great day! I do not feel like I have been able to say this for sometime, but today was great! We had new friends come over (which I am also reading a plethora of books right now, one of which is called “women are scary”. true title, I kid you not). In this book it talks about mom dates… so I pretty much suck at those. But today, it happened and it was good and it filled some of my tank, sooooo yay for mom dates! I also was able to accomplish the crazy, how fast can you clean your house and make it look decent before said friend comes over mode. I was able to make the kitchen look humane and vacuum the floors. Hey I consider those huge accomplishments.

Then I was able to go sing some songs, which does any heart good, and then finished with some zumba action. I have been attending zumba for the past few months due to some anxiety that crept its way back into my life. SO far Jesus and zumba are helping me out a ton! Now its off to kiss little heads and whisper “I love you’s” into their ears, do my stretches and fall asleep to reading one of my books… Peace out!


my mess of a dream

So I have this serious issue with floors. I cannot handle stuff on the floors. Toys and that sort of stuff is just fine, but hairs, dirt, food, it just grosses me out. If it touches the bottom of my foot I cannot go about my business. I sort of freak out. Now if this is your house, that is fine, I’ll keep my shoes on, but in my house I feel restless and am completely unable to focus if my floors are in that state. I feel out of control, and on top of that I have crawler, and the thought of her putting some crusty piece of old food in her mouth, well it makes my stomach turn. With that said, we recently got a dog. Oh yes, a dog. She is sweet, the girls love her, and she barks at anyone who comes to the door. mmmhmmm, do you sense my love? She really is sweet.  But the one thing that I absolutely loathe about her is the small amount of hair she sheds each and every moment of each and every day. I vacuum at least once a day. Oh and Im not a fan of weird scents, and she has that too, but we will just stick to the hair for now. So tonight after a very long day, I couldn’t take it any longer and I needed to vacuum. 9:45pm vacuum sesh, I think yes! We party hard around here.

So since I am a bit neurotic about my floors, I find it soothing to vacuum, are you sensing my weirdness? Go ahead, judge. I get lost in my thoughts while I vacuum, its almost therapeutic for me really. Its probably because it, the vacuum, produces some sort of white noise which drowns out the sound of small voices, barking dogs, and anyone else who might be trying to get my attention at the moment. So anyhow, I have a moment to think, in somewhat silence. So tonight as I was vacuuming away I started a conversation with the Lord. I started to think about the many things that frustrated me about today (its been one of those days where everything annoys you, is that just me? or do others get this way too?) I think about the many dog hairs that are being sucked up into the vacuum. I think about the Chinese student, whom I love dearly, but sometimes is hard to live with. I think about how my 3 year old has peed on the carpet twice three times in the last two three days, and I wish I had only wood throughout my house. I think about all of the many things that I am ungrateful for, the many things that I do not posses but so badly want…. uggggggggly ugly. I finally say in the stillness of my heart, “well this is definitely not my dream life”  (I can really be a sass to the Lord, sometimes.) And the Lord said, “your right.”

What??? I’m right? I was expecting the Lord to say something like, “yes, but you have this to be thankful for…and this… and this…”  but I’m right??? This isn’t my dream life?

Then this verse:

“in heaven I’ll have only you, and on this earth you are all that I want”

Psalm 73:25

 

popped into my head. Thank you, Holy Spirit! Then my thoughts start going…. Is He really all that I want? Is He really all that I strive after???? Right then as I am vacuumed  hundreds of hairs over the tattered rug that we’ve had for 8 years, which I purchased at Target with wedding gift cards, thinking about how I would sooooo love an updated rug. One that is “in style”, one that would really “put” my living room together. Is Christ all that I want, right now as I vacuum? As I go about my day? As I rest my weary head on my pillow at night? I know He is my deepest desire and I really honestly want Him to be all that I want. But my strongest desire is to have it all. To live the “American Dream” or at least my idea of what that means. But for what gain? I will have none of this when I get to heaven. Am I storing up treasures in heaven? Or am I creating a palace for me to find rest in while I live my life on this earth? Am I seeking comfort in stuff and my surroundings? Am I just seeking comfort in general? All things that will just burn away someday. Christ did not promise me a comfortable life. Actually the very opposite.

“take up your cross and follow me.” Matthew 16:24

To take up a cross means you are headed towards hardships, pain, loss, and definitely not comfort. There will probably be suffering of some kind if you choose to follow Christ. Sometimes, most times, I don’t like that idea if we are going to be honest. Who wants pain???? suffering??? But in that you become more like Christ in His sufferings. When we are weak we become strong, because we get Christ’s strength and no longer our piddly strength. This is actually really good news. Christ in His complete strength conquered death. He took on all of the pain, suffering, and all encompassing everything awful onto Himself. He experienced the deepest pain, sadness, and all things awful because what we experience as pain, Christ experienced everyones pain, everyones suffering, everyones sin, everyones all encompassing awfulness all at once. It makes my stomach get all uneasy to think about it. If you really take a brief moment and think about how gut wrenching awful that was, and how it felt…. oof. But then He not only took that pain, died, but He literally rose from the dead. Like His whole body was not there! whhhhhat???? Unbelievable strength! So even though taking up your cross sounds hard, painful, and sometimes completely unbearable, Christ’s unbelievable strength makes it possible to endure and press on. His strength makes it possible for me to get out of the rut of ungratefulness and onto the path of Holy Cow, God is great! This life that God has given me is good and what Ive been given is good. The dog hairs, the children screaming, the messy student, the tattered rug, all of this is good and is Gods grace to me in this season of life. And I am so thankful that there is more to look forward to instead of just this life and what it has to offer.

And I am thankful for a God who took all of my crap and everyone else’s junk and nailed it to a cross with himself so that I might have life and hope and joy and goodness in this really hard life that we sometimes live. In this temporary moment of struggle and strife I can take up my cross and I can look forward to the day where all I will have in heaven is Jesus and that is all that I need now and always!

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love, love, love…

A quick note… 

Everyday I do not go without hearing the words; “I love you mommy” or  “I love you so so much mommy”. Every time I hear these sweet words,  they melt my heart and place a small grin upon my face. Ava Joy is full of life and full of joy! Her name, Ava, actually means Life and well we all know what Joy means. I am astounded that her name breathes the very essence of who she is. 

It is a constant encouragement to me when I hear that someone loves me and genuinely loves me. I know she says it because she means it. It is amazing how many ways I see the Lord at work in this small child’s heart. 

 

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It is amazing how the Lord would use someone so small to works wonders in a heart such as mine. Thankful today for his kindness towards me as He uses a child to constantly bless my heart.


Idahoooooooo

A few weeks ago we braved a 9 hour trip to Idaho and a 10+ hour one back to Oregon. It was quite the adventure. This is the longest trip we have taken with two kiddos in the ghetto van thus far. Like I said it was an adventure, isn’t it always? (life that is). Steve and I had discussed leaving on a Tuesday night after work, but as that Tuesday approached I started to get anxious and wondered if it was such a hot idea. You know “hoping” that the kids would fall asleep in the car, like good little children and there would be no potty breaks, uh yeah right! So we decided against the insane idea (of leaving at night) and left the next morning. I enjoyed this idea much better because we packed the car the night before, woke in the morn, threw all of our bodies in the car, and started the trip with some Starbucks, now we are talking!

I think on the way there we stopped oh 10 times or more. We prayed over our ghetto van several times because once we hit the nothingness in Washington (who knows how many miles of no buildings) the temp spiked to the 90’s, 100’s somewhere in there. Just to give you an idea of the ghetto van, (now don’t get me wrong, we love the van, it was free and is a bigger blessing than we realize) but this van is from 1993 and it is a Ford Aerostar. The van has a radio and tape deck. We do however have AC, state of the art for her time I’d say.

  Now quick  side note… my friend Jacqueline drove one of these babies in college and it burned all of the way down to the ground in the Roth’s parking lot. For reals. I got the call after it had happened, my friend telling me she was standing in the parking lot looking at her burt to a crisp car. Is this the first time we have heard this, ummm nope! Apparently it’s an Aerostar thing. So you can see why one would pray hard over a van like this driving in to no man’s land, with 90+ degree weather…

So back to the 90’s+ weather… “We” start to get a bit worried how the ghetto girl will fair in this type O’ weather, because extra heat added to the already working hard engine is.well.a.no bueno.  Will today be the day she burns down? (honestly we really hope we never cross that road) Will the heat be too much for her to handle? So for miles of nothingness we worried, I mean we trusted the Lord… uhhh we just worried. The Lord was gracious and we finally made it to our destination! No cranky kiddos, no broken down car, no grumpy parents (well not too grumpy)… we had made it! Halleluia!

Anyhow in Idaho we stayed at Steve’s folks spot on “The River”. About 40+ family members showed up. We basically hang out for days, float down the river a few times, eat, talk, relax, and sleep in campers! It is pretty great if I do say so myself. And because I am a caffeine addict I always enjoy my sis n’ law and the fact she brings her rock star of an espresso machine to the river. It’s like wake up, have a legit latte, eat yummy camp food, and float da river! Can’t beat times like this with the fam.

Alrighty here are some precious pics of our time in Idaho!

Good morning to you!

Beautiful girl!

Yes they have everything at the river, even a kiddie pool for the youngsters.

Papa loves. I think he’s cute. This is good because Steve will potentially look like this someday.

My darling niece.

Aunt Kelli and Kyla. Getting ready for an outdoor movie night! How fun are my relatives?

On our way home from Idaho, we stopped in the windy Gorge.

Oh my Family is cute!

That is all.


gone again…

Hello I’m back, I know I know my last blog said something about goals. And something about me blogging once a week…. blah blah blah.  Well that is a goal and that is still on my heart. Unfortunately, for the last 6 weeks I have been taking some grad classes which has consumed my time. I really don’t like using that word but it is probably the truth. One of my classes was awesome and the other not so awesome, but I got A’s in both so I suppose I am a happy camper.

I am glad I took the classes because I have learned a few things about myself and a few things I was supposed to learn. I needed to take these classes so that I would not loose my teaching license. It’s something they make you do, if you teach, which I suppose is good if you send your children to public schools (knowing that the teachers are always learning). Every few years you get this treacherous letter in the mail from TSPC (teacher standards and practices) saying you either need to get your masters or do some grad credits within a certain amount of time (and this happens every 3 years). For me I am not teaching right now, well not in a “school” per se. I honestly don’t know if I ever see myself teaching in a public school again. Not because I am against this profession or anything but because God has blessed me with a husband and some sweet children. He has called me to something more because of the gifts he has blessed me with.

It says in Titus 2:3 “Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and train up the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.” – I honestly enjoy staying at home and I embrace my title as a Stay at home mom.

Proverbs 31: 27 “She looks well to the ways of her household”

I feel like in the last 6 weeks I have had some troubles at “looking well in the ways of my household/family”. Although the time I have spent was on something most people see as important, it was time nonetheless that took me away from my home obligations. My children got bits and pieces of me but not all of me, and so did my husband. Many nap times were spent reading many many books and writing a ton. Many evenings I was up until midnight composing papers, which I haven’t done since college. Due to staying up so late, it was often hard for me to want to rise up at all in the morning.

(aren’t they sweet??? How could I not want to spend all of my daytime hours with these girls?)

The classes did suck up a ton of time which I can never get back, but I have learned a few things about myself:

I am very capable of blogging once a week if not more.

I am also able to read more than once thought. (This has been a constant struggle for me since having children).

I have a new perspective for students who I minister too and how much time classes do take.

I understand different ways people interpret text due to their surrounding environment, which should be helpful when leading bible studies.

And I really do love reading and learning. I love engaging my mind.

So there you have it. That’s what I have been up to, with a few other things squeezed in as well.